nvrgnbk,
You could definitely be on the writing commitee!!
Thanks to you and Jeff for the laugh!
BA- Tears rolling down cheek from twisted humour!
Brother Apostate
JoinedPosts by Brother Apostate
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12
How is Paradise treating you nowadays?
by AK - Jeff ini just dawned on me that we must be in paradise now!
after all 1975 brought the end of the world, for which end we all sacrificed having children, careers, interesting work, hobbies and oral sex.
i missed some of those things [some more than others], but in the end it was good to set foot in that new earth, especially once we got the stench from the 6,000,000,000 dead behind us, and the shite off our 'newly inherited' luxury automobiles [those damndable carion birds].
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17
You and your double.
by LtCmd.Lore inhypothetical situation: one day you wake up, and when you get up and turn around you see that you are still lying in your bed.
tada there are now two of you.. i'm not talking like a twin, or clone... i mean an double, you and the other you both have the exact same memories, skills, likes, dislikes, goals and personality.. would you get along?
would you hate each other?
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Brother Apostate
We'd have a bloody drinkin' match, of course!
"I can drink you under the table!"
"Sez who?"
"Sez me!"
"Yer on, ya ugly bloke!"
"Whadda we drinkin?"
"All me fav'ritz!"
"Wow, those are all mine, too!"
And so on, and so forth, until we'd be prayin' to the porcelain convenience yet again, methinks.
Or worse yet, pushin' up daisies from being poisoned by our old buddy, Al.
BA- Or we'd have some fun playin' lots o' tricks on unsuspectin' folks.
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262
Global Warming Hysteria
by metatron inhttp://cjunk.blogspot.com/2007/02/quacks-cranks-and-junk-science.html.
are global warming skeptics really just cranks?
i don't doubt that we are having some effect on .
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Brother Apostate
From Metatron's post above (Global warming skeptic threatened with death):
"Scientists who dissent from the alarmism have seen their funds disappear, their work derided, and themselves labelled as industry stooges."
Good thing no one does that kind of thing here on JWD!
BA- Now, let's discuss the science (myscience, not yours!)
PS- ROTFLMAO@poor,pitiful,dismissive,arrogant,longwinded,hypocritical_narcissists!
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33
Who gets under your skin easier than anyone else you know?
by avidbiblereader inwho can just tick you off more or easily than anyone else you know?
a spouse, a child, a parent, a workmate, a certain elder or ms?.
abr.
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Brother Apostate
abr,
Q: Who gets under your skin easier than anyone else you know?
A: Big Brother.
BA- And the taxman, of course.
PS- Why don't you kick your stepson out if he is that obnoxious and irresponsible?
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26
Do you still believe that you have a chance of living eternally?
by JH inor, is it completely out of the question, and you know for sure that this life is it, and there is nothing else after.. maybe you believe that there is a possibility of eternal life, but you don't qualify..
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Brother Apostate
Yes, that is still my hope:
John 3: 11-21:
11I tell you the truth, we speak of what we know, and we testify to what we have seen, but still you people do not accept our testimony. 12I have spoken to you of earthly things and you do not believe; how then will you believe if I speak of heavenly things? 13No one has ever gone into heaven except the one who came from heaven—the Son of Man. [
d ] 14Just as Moses lifted up the snake in the desert, so the Son of Man must be lifted up, 15that everyone who believes in him may have eternal life.[ e ]
16"For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son,[
f ] that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. 17For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him. 18Whoever believes in him is not condemned, but whoever does not believe stands condemned already because he has not believed in the name of God's one and only Son.[ g ] 19This is the verdict: Light has come into the world, but men loved darkness instead of light because their deeds were evil. 20Everyone who does evil hates the light, and will not come into the light for fear that his deeds will be exposed. 21But whoever lives by the truth comes into the light, so that it may be seen plainly that what he has done has been done through God."[ h ]
As for where that everlasting, eternal life will be, who knows?
BA- We’ll know when we get there.
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"This Generation Will Not Pass Away"
by TooBad TooSad inthe well written post yesterday by onthewayout got me thinking about the doctrine on "this generation".
wts doctrine was in their top 7 doctrines right behind: 1) only 144,000 go to heaven, 2) the earth will be turned into a paradise,.
3) god is not a trinity, 4) not to take blood, 5) hell is not hot, 6) be no part of the world, 7) this generation will not pass away until of.
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Brother Apostate
Q: How many Governing Body members does it take to change a lightbulb?
A: They don't change it, instead, they call the resulting darkness "New Light".
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7
Good Samaritan
by Pahpa inis the lesson of the good samaritan lost on most jehovah's witnesses?
(luke 10) in jesus' parable, the priest and levite refused to help the victim who had been robbed, beaten and abandoned.
both "passed by on the other side" rather than help the poor man.
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Brother Apostate
Yes, they completely ingore mercy in favor of sacrifice.
Sacrifice time, sacrifice family, sacrifice career, sacrifice money,etc, etc, etc.
Mercy, on the other hand? I can not think of a single merciful aspect of JW teaching.
And while we're on this subject, a closely related question comes from James 1:27:
"Religion that God our Father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress..."
What have the JWs ever done for orphans and widows? Nothing.
What about other charitable contributions to the less fortunate brothers of humankind? Nothing.
Matthew 23:23,24 describes them well:
23 "Woe to you, teachers of the law and Pharisees, you hypocrites! You give a tenth of your spices—mint, dill and cummin. But you have neglected the more important matters of the law—justice, mercy and faithfulness. You should have practiced the latter, without neglecting the former. 24 You blind guides! You strain out a gnat but swallow a camel.
BA- Glad to have nothing to do with the modern day Pharisees and Scribes.
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Brother Apostate
That JW members must shun family members because they have been DF'd DA'd, etc.
The Watchtower Bible & Tract Society, destroying familys for the love of God (God=GB).
How can any teaching be less human, less loving, less God-like?
BA- Glad my kids are finally out of the borg and see it for what it really is.
PS- Conditional love is not love, not at all.
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3
Golfing Jokes
by Clam inmarvin found the following ransom note slipped under his .
front door.
"bring $50,000 to the 17th hole of your country .
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Brother Apostate
One Sunday morning, a priest wakes up and decides to go golfing. He calls his boss and says that he feels very sick, and won't be able to go to work.
Way up in heaven, Saint Peter sees all this and asks God, "Are you really going to let him get away with this?"
"No, I guess not, " says God.
The priest drives about five to six hours away, so he doesn't bump into anyone he knows. The golf course is empty when he gets there. So he takes his first swing, drives the ball 495 yards away and gets a hole in one.
Saint Peter watches in disbelief and asks, " Why did you let him do that?"
To this God says, "Who's he going to tell?"
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3
Golfing Jokes
by Clam inmarvin found the following ransom note slipped under his .
front door.
"bring $50,000 to the 17th hole of your country .
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Brother Apostate
A Catholic priest and a nun were
taking a rare afternoon off and
enjoying a round of golf. The priest
stepped up to the first tee and took a
mighty swing. He missed the ball
entirely and said "Shit, I missed."
The good Sister told him to watch
his language.
On his next swing, he missed again.
"Shit, I missed."
"Father, I'm not going to play with
you if you keep swearing," the
nun said tartly.
The priest promised to do better
and the round continued. On the
4th tee, he misses again. The usual
comment followed.
Sister ! is really mad now and says,
"Father John, God is going to
strike you dead if you keep swearing
like that."
On the next tee, Father John
swings and misses again. "Shit, I
missed."
A terrible rumble is heard and a
gigantic bolt of lightning comes out
of the sky and strikes Sister Marie
dead in her tracks.
And from the sky comes a booming voice .......
"Shit, I missed."